Breathe And Heal
by Himechiiii
Summary: Two months. Two months had passed since the end of the Fourth Great Shinobi War. Two months and Sakura still hadn't fully processed. Hadn't fully healed. "I don't know what I'm supposed to do now. I don't know what my goal is supposed to be. You say that I've passed them, but it doesn't feel like it. I close my eyes and all I see is their backs in front of me." [ Rated T for now ]
1. Part One - Inhale

A/N: Hiya! So it's been about six years since the last time I wrote something and decided I should publish it. But here I am! This fic is going to be very Sakura-centric, so if you don't like that, or if you are someone who likes to bash on Sakura, then this isn't the place for you. But if you're all about that beautiful Sakura love, then please stick around and I hope you enjoy!

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. Though I sometimes with Kishimoto-sensei also didn't own Naruto because then he might not have failed me.

* * *

Two months.

Two months since the end of the Fourth Great Shinobi War.

Two months since Sasuke had returned to Konohagakure.

Two months since the beginning of the rebuilding of the village.

Two months, and in that time Sakura had had no time to _really_ process. Her days were spent between assisting Tsunade with the care of all the injured, helping with the organization of the Hospital and it's rebuilding, speaking with the Elders in favor of Sasuke's pardon, and using any other spare time as an envoy between Konoha and Suna. She barely had the time to sit and eat, much less time to think.

She keeps her opinions to herself. Barely speaking unless spoken to or to give orders. She keeps focused on the task on hand and not on the hyperactive knucklehead who would pop his head in every so often with excited words and requests of her time. She doesn't take any time off to visit the last Sharingan user, despite the few times a messenger had been sent to ask of her presence. She doesn't even take her eyes off of her projects long enough to notice the all too familiar flash of silver hair and an annoying orange book that would appear every once in awhile but never stayed for too long, whose visits were far and few between.

Aside from the conversations with Elders, medic-nin, construction workers, and those she treated, Sakura only found herself talking with her Shishou.

"You're going to work yourself into an early grave." The calm, but stern voice of the Fifth Hokage came. "Take a break."

Without stopping her work, Sakura continued to heal the last of the wounds on her patient. She does however, take a small breath and glance back at the older woman.

"I haven't even used up half of my chakra today, shishou. You worry too much."

Her smile comes almost effortlessly as she turns back to the task at hand.

"After this I want you to take a break. That's an order."

"Wha- Shishou, I've barely even started my work for the day. I have much to do today. I don't have the luxury to be taking a break right now."

"You've been working yourself to chakra depletion since we got back to Konoha. When was the last time you spoke to Ino? Or someone from your team?" Tsunade moved to stand beside her pupil, "Sakura, you need to take a break. You've done more than enough these couple of months. I think it's high time that you take a break. I'm ordering you to take a break. If I see you anywhere near this hospital or anywhere else you have been working in the next week for anything other than an emergency then I'll make it so you won't be permitted to work for a month on top of that."

There was no room for Sakura to argue. She knew better than to fight back against the slug princess after she had put her foot down. So she turned her attention back to her patient without a word.

"After you finish up here you are free to go. Enjoy your vacation, Sakura. I mean it." And with that Tsunade was gone.

* * *

Sakura spent last hour and a half laying on her couch in her small apartment, something gifted to her by Lady Tsunade herself after their return since a majority of the housing districts had been destroyed. She had left the hospital with a huff and a small glare at her shishou nearly two hours before and since then had done nothing to help pass the time of the week ahead of her away.

"This is ridiculous. I should be doing something to help right now, not sitting around." Her words came out in an almost growl. She rolled onto her side, huffing and puffing, only to be met with blue eyes staring at her sheepishly from her window.

"Ah, hey there Sakura-chan. I stopped by your office and ran through the hospital to see you, but the old lady said that were home taking a break. Which is great, because everyone needs a break sometimes and you hardly take any. And I was gonna see if you wanted to get something to eat! It doesn't even have to be ramen, even though the old man at Ichiraku gave me a coupon for free ramen for life so we wouldn't even have to pay..."

Naruto.

Tsunade had been right. Sakura couldn't remember the last time she had spoken to anyone on her team since returning aside from a few words here and there. Just seeing the blond and hearing his casual yet excited rambling caused all the frustration in her to just fade. She couldn't stop the small smile from forming and the bit of laughter that passed her lips.

"Breathe, Naruto. The last thing we need is the future Hokage dying from lack of oxygen."

When was the last time she had been able to joke around like this?

"Like I would let that happen! You're not getting rid of me that easily, not when we finally have Team Seven back together!"

And just like that, her playful mood was gone. It felt almost like the breath was knocked out of her, causing an ache in her chest.

"You've been so busy working that you haven't even gotten to chance to see the bastard, have you, Sakura-chan? We should invite him out to eat with us! It will be my treat! We can even invite Kakashi-sensei and Sai too!"

"No." The word comes out before she can even stop it.

"Huh? What do you mean no?"

"A-Ah… I mean, I'm really tired, Naruto. I don't think I'm really up to going out tonight. Sorry."

"Oh! Well that's fine, Sakura-chan. If you want I could bring you something?"

It was almost as if he had caught on to her discomfort, and honestly it didn't surprise her. She knew Naruto wasn't dumb.

"I'm okay, Naruto. Thank you."

"Oh," he sounded to dejected. "Okay."

"But, maybe we can go get dinner tomorrow? Ramen?"

And just like that, his carefree smile was back and the weight on Sakura's chest lessened just a bit.

"Yeah! It's a date!" Red filled his features and he nearly fell out of her window. "I- I mean not a _date_ date. Just like, a plan. It's a plan! But that sounds stupid... I didn't mean it like we were going on a date, Sakura-chan, I just meant that I was looking forward to it. That's all."

Sakura let herself laugh a bit, unable to hold back when Naruto was his most pure.

"Don't worry about it, Naruto. I'll see you tomorrow night."

"Ahaha, yeah, I'll see you tomorrow night!"

She watched as he gave a wave and then was jumping from her window to the neighbor's roof. She waited till he was out of sight and she could no longer sense his chakra signature to let the smile fall off her face. The ache in her chest was brought to the front of her attention.

"What is wrong with me?"

* * *

Hours seem to pass her by and soon the light coming through her window was nothing more than the moon and a few street lights. The cool night breeze passed through, falling over her small form, still draped over her couch as she had been hours before. The ache in her chest was still going strong, as were the thoughts running through her head. Thoughts of a certain pair of black eyes that had haunted her dreams for the last few years. Thoughts of a pair of blue eyes that put the daytime sky to shame. Thoughts of her teammates by her side. And thoughts of them suddenly ahead of her. And then thoughts of them completely out of sight. The pain in her chest growing.

The sound of knocking snapped her back into reality. She waited a moment, waiting to hear the sound again, almost as confirmation that she was really hearing it. Once again the soft rapping came and Sakura stood.

Pulling open the door, she was met with the sight of a blonde, but this time with long hair and a smile that was more comforting than the grin of her teammate.

"I heard that Lady Tsunade forced your ass outta the hospital and threatened you with a month long vacation if you didn't stay away for at least a week. I brought the good stuff."

Ino held up two bottles of sake.

"Have I told you lately that I love you?"

"No, but you can make up for lost time but letting me in and drinking these with me."

Sakura stepped aside allowing her best friend to come in. She closed the door behind the other kunoichi whom was already making herself at home. She grabbed two glasses for each of them, placing them down on the small coffee table in front of Ino.

"So rumor has it, and you know I love listening to town gossip, that you haven't even seen Sasuke once since his return. And before you say anything, his trial doesn't count. So what's going on, forehead?"

"Ino, I don't- There isn't anything going on. I've just been busy. You know that. You've seen the state that the war put the hospital in. You've seen all those who needed to be treated."

"You're right. I have seen all of that. But I've also seen you working extra hours when the hospital has been fully staffed. I've seen you completely ignore when Naruto had come to visit, and ignore whenever Sasuke had requested to see you. You've been avoiding them, Sakura, and it's about time you realize that yourself so you can figure out why."

Ino looked her dead in the eye as she downed a shot of the sake and poured herself another. Sakura followed suit, taking a shot herself, finding that she was entirely too sober for this conversation.

"I- I'm not avoiding them. I just- I just need some time. I think." She barely spoke above a whisper. Still a bit unsure about her thoughts.

"And that's okay. You know that, right? You can take time for yourself. I mean, you've been chasing after one thing for the last five years, and now that you've accomplished it it's normal to feel different."

Another shot.

"I just don't know how to feel. I don't know when it stopped being about bringing Sasuke back because I wanted him back."

Another shot.

Ino poured them both another round, humming softly in thought.

"Do you still love him?"

"I- What? Why're you asking that now?"

"Don't answer my question with a question. Do you still love Sasuke?"

"I wouldn't have let you in if I knew that this is where the conversation was going to go."

"Yes you would have. Now answer the damn question already."

There was silence between the two of them that felt like it would last forever. Sakura knocked back a few more mouthfuls of the sake and let it slide down her throat slowly. Letting the burn of the alcohol take over her thoughts for a few short seconds.

"I do." This time her words did come out as a whisper.

"What?"

"I said I do. I still love him."

"Okay. Do you love Naruto?"

Sakura nearly choked, coughing roughly over the burn becoming a bit stronger. Her face suddenly felt warmer than usual and she wasn't sure if it was Ino's question or the alcohol that was causing the sensation.

"What are you getting at, Ino?"

"I'm taking that as a yes unless you deny it." The Yamanaka heiress paused, giving her red faced friend more than enough time to reject the statement before continuing. "I think you should take the time Lady Tsunade has given you to sort out your feelings. You don't have to do it all tonight, but we do have another bottle to finish after this one, so now is a good time to start."

"I don't even know what I should be sorting out. So I love them both. I will get over it eventually."

Ino snorts, perfectly suited to her childhood nickname. "How? By drowning yourself in work so you don't have time to think about them?"

"Maybe..."

"Yeah, that isn't happening. You know why? Because you won't be the only one who ends up unhappy in that situation."

"They will be fine."

"I'm sure they will be. But being fine doesn't mean that they will be happy. Dammit Sakura, don't you think that it's about time you three allow yourself to be happy? Think about it: let's assume that you follow through with this plan of yours. You ignore your feelings, allowing yourself to be carried away by your work. Fine. Maybe Naruto ends up married, probably to Hinata bless her heart, but he won't truly be happy. Don't get me wrong, he will love her as much as he can, but he won't really be in love with her. Not the way that he loves you. We've all seen how he looks at you like you've hung the moon and that the sun is coming out of your ass. He loves you more than anyone I've seen someone love someone."

The thought uncomfortably with Sakura. The thought of Naruto five or ten years in the future, Hokage with Hinata or someone else at his side. Him spending late nights in the Hokage tower with no one to yell at him and force him to get some sleep and spend time with his family. With his wife.

"And then there is Sasuke. Knowing him, once his probation that he's been placed on is lifted, once he is able to take missions outside of the village, he will also drown himself in work. He will take mission after mission, only giving himself enough time in the village to barely keep his house clean. He won't even try to heal. He won't go back to the Uchiha compound and try to rebuild it. He won't try to salvage what's left of his family because he won't fully have the support he would need to help him through it. Not if you're avoiding him and avoiding your feelings. Let's say he too ends up with someone. He won't love them. We both know that. He would marry someone purely with the intent of rebuilding his clan. He wouldn't be happy."

"Ino…"

"No! You know what? I think you need to hear this. Sakura, you worked so hard to catch up with Naruto and Sasuke. I know that because I watched you those two years that Naruto was off training with Lord Jiraiya. You trained like crazy to become better. You took hit after hit from Lady Tsunade until you were able to avoid every single one. You worked on your strength until your hands bled. You became the best medic-nin I have ever heard of, surpassing Lady Tsunade herself. You spent three years building and storing your chakra so you could form that seal on your big billboard forehead! You have come so far just to be able to stand next to Naruto and Sasuke, and if I am being honest, despite everything that they have done, I think you've even passed them even if by just a little. Why would you work this hard only to just give up after reaching your goal?"

"Because I don't know what my goal is now!"

Once again silence filled the room. Sakura had brought her fist down with her words which in turn broke the small table in front of them. She was shaking as tears pricked at her eyes, threatening to come down.

"I don't know what I'm supposed to do now. I don't know what my goal is supposed to be. You say that I've passed them, but it doesn't feel like it. I close my eyes and all I see is their backs in front of me. All I see is them walking away and leaving me again. I don't want them to leave me again."

And she was crying. She barely registered the hot tears streaming down her cheeks as she was pulled into a tight hug.

"They can't leave me if I don't let them back in."

"Oh, Sakura…"

Ino shushed her friend, running her fingers through pink locks. She rocked the crying kunoichi gently, whispering comforting words until her breathing was once again steady and the tears had slowed.

The ache in Sakura's chest was stronger than ever as emotion after painful emotion washed over her. Her head was swimming with thoughts, with Ino's descriptions of the possible future, with her feelings for the two people who meant everything to her, with images of impossibly blue eyes and dark eyes she spent so many days getting lost in back when she was younger.

They sat like that for what felt like hours, allowing the silence around them to comfort them like a blanket. Neither one spoke aside from Ino's hushed whispers and the occasional sound of Sakura mumbling through tears. And once it was completely silent, once the air around them was no longer thick with tension, Ino spoke again.

"I want you to be happy, Sakura. And I'm not the only one. Ever since we've been back, Lady Tsunade has been keeping a close eye on you. I overheard her talking with Shizune-san a couple weeks ago, she was drunk, but still she was thinking about you. She kept telling Shizune-san that she didn't want you to end up like her. She brought up Lord Jiraiya a few times too. To be honest, I didn't know she felt that way about him. I didn't stick around much longer to hear more. It felt a lot more private at that point. But my point is, so many people want you to be happy. They only one stopping that from happening is you. You can't let the fear of them leaving you stop you from being happy. If you let fear get to you then you would never have become the beautiful and powerful flower that you've blossomed into. You're not that little bud I found crying with her hair covering her face. Not anymore. You haven't been for years now."

Sakura sniffed, "When did you become so smart, Ino-pig?"

"Hey! I've always been this smart, forehead!"

They both started laughing, the tension in the room completely gone. The conversation stayed more lighthearted from there as they cleaned up the mess that was the coffee table. Ino made sure to salvage the two sake cups and what was left of the first bottle of sake. Once everything was cleaned up, Ino poured them each another round and handed it to Sakura with ease.

"I told Shikamaru that I loved him. Like right as we got back."

"What? What happened after that?"

"He rejected me. But like, it was okay. I cried a bit, but after that I felt really good. I had this pain in my chest for months whenever I saw him with Temari, and after realizing I was jealous or whatever, I decided that I wasn't going to just mope around, so I told him."

"It's been two months. Why didn't you tell me sooner?"

"I didn't want to make a big deal out of it. It happened, and then I was over it. I mean, don't get me wrong. Sometimes when I think about it it still hurts a bit. I still get sad thinking about what if and such, but at the end of the day I was happy I told him. Now he knows. And now it's his loss."

Ino grinned over at her best friend, and suddenly Sakura understood.

"I don't think I'm ready."

"I don't think you can really prepare yourself for something like this, forehead. It just happens. You just do it."

Both girls knock back yet another shot, getting back into their rhythm. They were almost through the entire first bottle. Once again their cheeks were flushed a light shade of pink, and this time from the alcohol for sure.

"How will this even work? I just pull both of them aside and tell them that I love them both? Even if they both feel the same way, with my luck they will just fight like they used to and end up back in the hospital. _And_ I'll be the one who will have to heal them."

The two were laughing again, picturing the all out war that would be Naruto and Sasuke fighting over Sakura's love.

"You'd be living every girl in the village's wet dream! Konoha's very own hero and the Uchiha bad boy that every girl used to lust after fighting over you. Now that is a sight I would want to see."

"Ino! I'm being serious!"

More laughter and another shot passed their lips.

"I dunno, Sakura. Why don't you start by not avoiding them. You don't have to jump head first and just declare your love. Spend some time with them. Relearn how to be yourself around them. Relearn how to be Team Seven. Once you're ready, well you'll know. If anything it will just happen. You'll just say it. Over everything else though, you need to let yourself heal. Focus on how you feel around them. See for yourself how much you've caught up to them. Everything will fall into place once you're confident in yourself again."

Sakura grinned at her best friend, "Seriously, Ino-pig, I don't know when you got this smart."


	2. Part Two - Count to Ten

A/N: So I actually started writing this pretty much right after I uploaded the first chapter. That being said, it was around 2 or 3 am when I started writing. I apologize in advance if some things don't make sense or ramble on. I think once I am done with the story itself, I'll go back, or have my beta who is on vacation right now, go over anything and fix what needs touching up.

Thank you for everyone who has given me kudos! And again, I hope you enjoy this chapter!

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto

* * *

The morning after came fast and came in a blur. Sakura woke up with lilac painted toes in her face and the taste of stale alcohol in her mouth. Her throat was dry and her tongue felt as if she had spent the night with cotton balls in her mouth. To top it all off, she was certain she had a headache from hell itself. Part of her wanted to just roll over and sleep the day away, ignore the pile of broken wood and table legs sitting in the corner of her living room, ignore the fact that she was certain she still smelled of yesterday, and most of all ignore the conversation she had with Ino that was coming back to her in waves. Despite her urge, the sun was shining through the window and was hitting directly onto her face meaning there was no way she would be falling back to sleep anytime soon.

After a moment of groaning and procrastination, she shoved Ino's feet off of her chest, sat up and made her way towards the kitchen. Her body swayed slightly with each step causing the room around her to spin, but after a moment, and the feeling of her hand gripping the counter, the world centered itself and all she was left with was a slight feeling of nausea.

Once she was certain she wouldn't fall over, or throw up all over her kitchen floor, Sakura padded about the room. She began brewing a fresh pot of tea, hoping the caffeine would help take the edge off of the headache, before heading into the bathroom for a quick shower. The warmth of the water beating down on her skin, just hot enough to turn her skin red but not too hot to be painful. The soothing feeling of the soap taking away yesterday's dirt mixed with the slight sticky feeling of spilt sake that had dried on her skin. The sudden wave of feeling refreshed as she stepped out of the shower with a towel around her hair and a towel around her body.

"S'kra… I need to pee."

The voice of her best friend came through the door, groggy and probably still half asleep.

"I'll be out in a sec."

She shuffled around, drying herself off before re-wrapping her towel around herself. She picked up her stray clothes from the night before, shoving them into the nearby hamper with a mental note to do laundry soon.

"All yours." Her voice was soft knowing fully well that most noises above a whisper would set the blonde off. Ino was the worst with a hangover and no caffeine.

Sakura heard the small click of the bathroom door shutting as she walked into her bedroom. She wasn't allowed to go to work today, so she found some of her civilian clothes and slipped them on. Her outfit was simple, a red quarter sleeve shirt and a blue skirt. Out of habit, she grabbed her black shorts and put them on underneath.

After tying her hair back with an all too familiar red ribbon, she searched around in her drawers and pulled out two little black pills. She kept them around just in case she had to visit Tsunade early in the morning before the Hokage had a chance to take care of her hangover. She popped one of the pills, feeling the effects slowly taking place, and took the other back out with her to the main rooms.

Ino was back on the couch, this time sitting up, but her head rested against her hand with her eyes closed tightly.

"I have a present for you." Sakura spoke, moving towards the blonde.

"Unless you're giving me your bed with all the curtains closed for the next twenty-four hours, I don't want it."

Sakura laughed, "Mm, I think you'll want this."

She placed the small pill into Ino's hand, watching those blue eyes peek open in curiosity.

"Tsunade-shishou's special cure all. Trust me, it works."

Ino paused, taking time to look at the pill once more before giving a little shrug and throwing it into her mouth.

"Please tell me you have something with lots of caffeine in it."

"I'm making tea."

"Mm… screw Naruto and Sasuke. Marry me instead."

Sakura let out a small snort, "If that's all it takes to win your love then you should've proposed to me years ago, Ino-pig."

"Har har har."

The medic-nin moved herself away from the couch and back into the kitchen. Part of her considered making breakfast for the two of them, but knowing Ino, she would drink some tea before leaving with a kiss to the cheek and a goodbye after she woke up a bit more. So she waited for the water to finish boiling before pouring it over the tea leaves and serving it up.

"Time s'it? I have to be back at the flower shop by noon."

"You've got time. It's only a bit passed eight."

Sakura placed the cups of tea on an end table, giving herself another mental note to go and buy another coffee table while she is out today.

"If you have some free time later today you should stop by. I could always use some help with a few flower arrangements." The offer was simple, but Sakura knew it was Ino's way of giving her an out if she needed it today.

"I'll think about it. I need to do some shopping today since I've been putting it off for awhile. And I did promise Naruto I would go get dinner with him today. Which probably means him and the rest of the team at Ichiraku."

"Hm… Want me to see if Choji and Shika are busy? We could pretend to just stumble upon you guys. That way you have some support?"

Sakura smiled at her friend, "I think I'll be okay. Like you said, I gotta figure all of this out."

"Well, you know where to find me if anything comes up."

"I know, thanks Ino-pig."

"Anything for you, billboard brow."

* * *

Even with all the construction going on, the market district was as busy as ever. It had been awhile since the last time she had been able to just walk through the streets and people watch. She saw a few familiar faces, most of which she smiled at or gave a small wave.

"Sakura-chan!"

The kunoichi gave a small huff of laughter, turning around right as Naruto came barreling up to her. He was bright and full of smiles, sweat glistening in tiny beads around his forehead as if he had been running around for awhile.

"You're up early, Naruto."

"Ah yeah, I woke up early to do some sparring with the bastard. We're taking a short break and that's when I saw you. Are you doing anything?"

Sakura applauded herself for not flinching when Sasuke's name came up. Despite her conversation with Ino last night, it was still hard for her to not pretend like things were still the same as before Sasuke returned. At the same time, she knew she couldn't pretend like things were back to the way they were before Sasuke even left.

"I'm doing a bit of shopping, my fridge is almost empty and I need to buy a new coffee table."

"What happened to the old one?"

"Ino stopped by last night with two bottle of sake and things might've gotten outta hand."

"Aww! If I knew Ino was gonna come over last night I would've stopped by too. I never get to drink with you Sakura-chan!"

She smiled at her teammate and he gave his best pout. Her chest felt warm at the sight of him, hands moving excitedly as he spoke and eyes shining brightly. The way his lips moved at a mile a minute, trying to fit in as many words as he could before taking a breath. The way his nose wrinkled with some words or his dimples showed when he was really happy and smiling like the goofball he was.

"-kura-chan? Sakura-chan?"

Hearing her name quickly snapped her out of her thoughts, her cheeks flushing both from being caught lost in thought and from the thoughts she was having.

"I'm sorry, what was that?"

"I was asking if I could help you. Get a new coffee table, I mean. Because I figured you will be carrying grocery bags as well as a table, but if I were there you could carry less and have a free hand?"

"You don't have to, Naruto. I think I manage it on my own. Besides, didn't you just say you were only taking a short break from sparring with Sasuke-kun?"

"We can invite him too! The more hands to carry things!"

Before Sakura could even protest, she felt herself being dragged along towards the training grounds.

"Naruto wait- I really am fine, I don't-"

She was cut short as her eyes met Sasuke's. She had looked into his eyes so many times, but this time was different. She hadn't looked at him in so long, only catching glimpses of him at his trial, and very little else. She felt like her heart was in her throat, like she couldn't breathe or speak.

"Sakura."

Her name leaving his lips was soft, but also almost sad.

"Sasuke! We're gonna help Sakura-chan with her shopping. She has to buy a lot of groceries and a new table and who know what else. And I figured since she only has two hands we could help her out. We can stop sparring for a little longer, right?"

"Yeah. Okay."

"See Sakura-chan? Sasuke is going to help too so now you don't have to carry as much."

Sakura was tongue tied. She was being swept away with each second she didn't speak up, but she could bring herself to speak. Her eyes were focused on Sasuke. Seeing him again after two months, seeing him roaming around Konoha with no ANBU escort, with his hands completely free, with him in everyday clothes, it was like everything she felt when she was twelve was sudden rushing back.

' _The only one keeping you from being happy is yourself.'_

"I- I appreciate the help…" Her words came out slowly, "Thank you."

If she hadn't been so focused on Sasuke, she might not have noticed the way his shouldered seemed to relax and his eyes seemed to soften. It was a small reaction, barely even there, but she had seen it. Her gazed turned towards Naruto who was beaming. Her heart ached at the sight of her two boys happy. They were happy.

"Well come on, we're wasting daylight. I want to get the fresh vegetables before they're all gone."

"You should pick up some instant ramen too, Sakura-chan, that way you don't have to cook all the time."

"Not everyone survives off of instant ramen, idiot."

"I'm not an idiot, you bastard! And I'm not saying she has to survive off of ramen, I'm just saying it would be good for when she works late at the hospital and doesn't want to cook!"

"Hn."

Before she knew it, Sakura felt herself laughing. Tears pricked at the sides of her eyes, but she kept laughing and laughing and laughing.

"Sakura-chan?"

She hadn't even realized that she was crying, sobbing almost, around her laughter.

"I- I'm sorry… I- I don't know why I'm crying right now. I promise I was just laughing."

Nonetheless, her tears didn't stop, and soon enough she was actually sobbing. Her chest ached, almost as if something were squeezing her heart. She felt a hand on her shoulder and she honestly didn't know if it belonged to Naruto or Sasuke, but it felt so warm and comforting and _safe_ that she didn't even care.

"It's okay, Sakura-chan. It's okay."

And for the second time in the last twenty-four hours, Sakura was being pulled into a hug. The all too familiar scent of Naruto surrounded her, spicy with a bit of pine and dirt mixed in.

"Sakura-chan… It's okay to cry."

"I don't know why I'm crying though. I was just laughing because you two were arguing like you used to. I was happy. I _am_ happy. So why am I crying?"

"You're overwhelmed." Sasuke's voice was calm, stoic like it always had been, but it was also soft, something that Sakura had only heard in his voice twice before: once when he thanked her before knocking her out and leaving, and the other when he apologized as she healed him after his and Naruto's final fight.

"It's okay, Sakura-chan."

So she cried. She cried until she was hiccuping. She cried till her eyes were red and puffy and hard to keep open. She cried till her nose was running causing Naruto to pull out a small cloth and wipe her face for her. She cried until her eyes felt dry and no more tears would come out. What a sight she must make. She was an accomplished medic kunoichi with a war under her belt and she was crying in public.

A moment passed.

Then another.

"Feel better?" Naruto's voice broke the silence, much like it had so many times before, but this time it was quiet like what he was saying was a secret on her and Sasuke were allowed to hear.

"Actually, yeah. Funny how a good cry can do that?"

She giggled softly, voice a bit hoarse from her previous sobbing. There was still an ache in her chest, but much like last night, it wasn't as heavy. She took in a deep breath and put on a small smile.

"Okay! Take two! Let's go get those groceries for real this time."

She didn't even give herself enough time to overthink, she took both of her teammate's hands in her own and began walking. Without any resistance, Naruto allowed himself to be dragged before catching up to walk beside her, soon followed by Sasuke.

Today was going to be a long day.

* * *

"Alright, last thing I need is some rice and maybe some noodles then we can head to the furniture stores."

Sakura looked back at the two following close behind her, each with bags in their hands. Naruto was looking at a few different packs of instant ramen while Sasuke was filling his a bag of his own with a few tomatoes. She smiled at the domestic sight.

"I was thinking," she started. "We are supposed to go get dinner together tonight, right? Would you mind if I changed the plans a bit?"

"Are you cancelling?"

She could already see a pout beginning to form on Naruto's facial features.

"No, actually I was thinking maybe we could do dinner at my apartment? It's small, but I think it could fit the three of us. And then tomorrow maybe we could go out and maybe invite Kakashi-sensei, Sai and Yamato-sensei?"

And just like that, the grin on Naruto's face was back.

"I mean, if that works for both of you?"

She took in a small, shaky breath, looking from Naruto to Sasuke once more.

"Can you make homemade ramen, Sakura-chan?"

"I guess I can, I might need to pick up one or two extra things. Is there anything you want, Sasuke-kun?"

There was a pause, and Sakura almost found herself taking everything back and saying it was a bad idea.

"Homemade ramen doesn't sound bad. Can there be pork belly in it?"

Relief rushed through her body as she nodded enthusiastically.

"Yeah, I think I can manage that. Homemade pork belly ramen it is then."

"Ooh! Sakura-chan can I bring some sake? You got to drink with Ino last night, and since you don't work for the next day, it should be okay, right?"

"Mm, maybe not tonight, Naruto."

Eating dinner with them was one thing, but being drunk and not fully in control of her emotions or actions was a whole other experience she didn't think she was ready for. Luckily Naruto didn't push it, instead moving onto a conversation with Sasuke about the necessity if having fish cake circles in ramen and how those without weren't truly flavorful ramen. Their conversation slowly became white noise as she continued her shopping, picking up the extra things she would need for tonight.

* * *

"Did you really need to buy three extra floor cushions, Sakura-chan?"

"Hey, I don't want to hear you complaining, you are the one who offered to help me carry all of this stuff. You could've very easily just stayed and sparred with Sasuke-kun."

"All this stuff is heavy, Sakura-chan! There is no way you would've been able to carry all of this on your own."

"It wouldn't be the first time." She state simply, as if carrying ten plus grocery bags, a large piece of furniture and a few other miscellaneous things wasn't a feat in itself.

Naruto didn't reply verbally, instead going for a wide-eyed, slack jawed response.

"You're amazing Sakura-chan! Scary, but amazing!"

Sakura felt a tiny puff of pride fill her at the compliment, but she didn't let it show. She rolled her eyes playfully.

"It's called multitasking, Naruto. You should learn it."

A barely audible huff of laughter came from behind her and she glanced back to see Sasuke with the corner of his mouth ticked up. She counted that as a win.

"That's mean, Sakura-chan!"

"She's only telling the truth."

"Shut up you bastard!"

She began to tune out their banter as she moved all the bags she was carrying into one hand. She shuffled around her in the pocket of her skirt, searching for her keys, and finally moving up the steps in front of her to unlock her door.

"Naruto, you can put the table and cushions in the living room. Sasuke-kun could you put those groceries in the kitchen? I'll start putting things away if you'll start on putting together the table."

She heard them both make sounds of confirmation as she started on her task.

A few moments passed by as she was distracted by putting things away. And once that was done, she glanced into the living room to see the coffee table completely put together and the three cushions placed around it, two of which were occupied.

"Thank you for helping me today."

She took in the sight before her. It was weird seeing her teammates both sitting in her home, acting as if they had always been there, like they belonged there. It made the ache in her heart come to the front of her mind. She took in a breath through her nose and slowly breathed out through her mouth.

"I'll probably start making dinner in an hour or so, in the meantime would either of you like some tea?"

"Yes please!"

"Sure."

Sakura brought over three cups and the teapot, still warm from this morning. She filled each up before sitting down and allowing herself a moment to relax.

"So Sakura-chan, since you have the whole week off, do you maybe wanna come spar with me and the bastard? Kakashi-sensei sometimes shows up, but it's always at random times. We could take turns. It's been awhile since we've all sparred together!"

"I don't know, Naruto…"

"Come on, Sakura-chan! You can show Sasuke how strong you've gotten! I bet you'd even kick his ass! You should've seen the first time I saw how strong Sakura had gotten, Sasuke! I'd just gotten back from training with Ero-sensei and Kakashi-sensei had us do the bell test again. He did that thing where he hides underground as a way to sneak up on us, but then Sakura punched the ground and the earth just crumbled beneath us! She even surprised Kakashi-sensei!"

"I couldn't let you show me up. You were gone for two years learning who knows what. Besides, we only ended up getting the bells because you knew Kakashi-sensei's weakness."

"Yeah, but Sakura-chan you were able to corner him three different times with that brute strength of yours!"

"I'll show you brute strength." Sakura growled teasingly, fist balling.

"W-Wait! Sakura-chan that was a compliment! I swear! Besides! That strength has saved me a few times. It's been a while since that bell test and you've only gotten stronger."

Sitting back down, Sakura could feel her cheeks flush a bit. She was used to Naruto gushing at her, but sometimes it was a bit much.

"That may be true, but I've still got a long ways to go before I'm as good as you or Sasuke-kun."

Her voice was small, like she wasn't happy with having to admit what she knew was true.

"What're you talking about, Sakura-chan? You're just as good and us. I can't even use medical ninjutsu! Not to mention that my chakra control isn't nearly as good as yours. I just have a lot of chakra."

"Being able to use medical ninjutsu doesn't mean I'm as good as you, Naruto. And chakra control doesn't do me very good if I don't have the skill to use it on. Kakashi-sensei has said it before: my strength is good but it means nothing if I can't land a hit. Not to mention that my genjutsu skills are still lacking in some areas, and I hardly even use weapons so I'm pretty much useless in a fight with a ninja who uses primarily weapons."

Her fist clenched at the word useless. She hated that word. She hated that the word had been used to so many times to describe her. She hated that the word could still be used to describe her.

"Sakura-chan…"

"Fight me."

Green eyes shot up, landing on the source of the declaration.

"Sasuke-kun?"

"I want to see your improvement. So fight me."

"You don't have to do that, Sasuke-kun. Naruto was just-"

"Sakura."

His gaze was fully on her and he wasn't letting up. It was calculating, searching over her as if he were looking for something specific. Then he stopped, waiting a moment, before stood.

"Get changed. We can go to training grounds three. First one to land thirty hits wins. Naruto will keep count."

"Sasuke-kun, I don't-"

"Come on Sakura-chan! It'll be fun! You'll land thirty hits on him easily."

Sakura took in a deep breath.

"Don't hold back, Sasuke-kun."

"Didn't plan on it."


	3. Part Three - Pause

A/N: I was hoping to have this chapter up two days ago, but I found myself really stumped on the fight scene. It's been a few years since I last wrote a fanfiction, and even longer since the last time I wrote a fight scene. So I apologize if it's not the best. That being said, I am happy with how this chapter turned out. This is the turning point for Sakura, I think from here on out we will get to see her start to really heal. As always, I hope you enjoy this chapter! Please feel free to leave me some feedback and I'll try to get back to you as soon as I can.

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. If I did, I probably would've let Sasuke have his revolution.

* * *

Despite all of the reconstruction that had been going on most of the training fields hadn't been touched leaving the ground uneven with piles of debris scattered about the grounds. Still, just seeing what was left was enough to make Sakura feel rather nostalgic.

"With all three of us here, it almost makes me feel like we're going to have to do the bell test again."

Even with nervousness taking up most of her thoughts, she prided herself on the steadiness of her voice. A small smile made its way to her lips as her eyes scanned the surrounding area.

"Ready?" Sasuke came into her view, "First one to thirty."

"First one to thirty."

Sakura readied herself, keeping her body light but also firm to the ground. Her eyes met his, and then they were off. She knew his speed, she knew that the moment she lost track of him was the moment she lost. She was quick to pull out a kunai, shooting forward until the sound of metal hitting metal rang in the air.

 _Faster._ She had to be faster. And just as she was thought it she felt a blade slide through the fabric of her shirt.

"Sasuke, one!" Naruto's voice broke through the sound of kunai clashing.

Focusing chakra into her feet, she slammed one of her heels down, breaking up the earth below them and forcing them both back.

" _All I need is one hit. One hit to find his weak spot."_

She waited for the dust to clear, eyes focused on her teammate. He didn't seem to be planning on making the first move. His eyes were calculating, Sharingan activated. She pocketed her kunai once more.

" _If I'm going to hit him, if I'm going to win this, I can't use weapons. He will block them too easily, especially with that Sharingan of his. I need to find his blind spot… but where?"_

Running forward once more she pumped her chakra into her fist, using her speed to throw punch after punch. Sasuke moved with an ease that irked her. It was almost as if he didn't even need to try to avoid her. He wasn't even attacking back, completely on defense. Her speed picked up, forcing more power into each hit. She stopped her attack to swipe a leg in hopes to take off his balance. He dodged her leg right as she threw another punch and knocked him back into a tree.

"Sakura-chan, one!"

" _Hell yeah!"_

She allowed herself to mentally cheer, but didn't let it distract her. She ran forward once again on the offense. Sasuke pushed himself off of the tree, running towards her. His movements were precise and he matched each of her attacks with one of his own.

"Stop holding back."

Sakura nearly stopped attacking at the sound of his voice. The distraction did cause her to stumble allowing Sasuke to land his attack. She felt the pain shoot through her body before she even had time to register that she had hit the ground.

"Sasuke, two!"

"What do you mean? I'm not holding back!" She growled her words out, anger taking over.

"If you weren't holding back you would've hit me more times than you have. I've been tracking your movements. You're hesitating with each hit. You're unsure of yourself. You're holding yourself back."

His words only seemed to tick her off more. She stood and moved to attack once again.

"I'm not hesitating!" Her body moved with each word, fists hitting everywhere but him.

"Then why won't you hit me?"

Sakura let out a scream, her fist colliding with a tree seconds after Sasuke had vanished. She felt his presence behind her and before she could react she was being pinned to the ground.

"Get out of your head. If you're not going to take this fight seriously then I'm ending it here."

He moved himself off of her. There was a ringing in Sakura's ears and fury filled her body. Pushing off the ground, she charged her chakra into her fist once more. She ran towards him with another scream and her fist colliding… with nothing. He appeared behind her, breath fanning over her neck. She turned quickly, preparing herself to block his attack, only to feel a soft thump against her forehead.

"We can continue this later."

His middle and pointer fingers rested inches from her forehead and she stared at them in confusion. All of the anger had fizzled out of her system and she was just left dumbfounded.

"Wha-"

"You're thinking too much. You're letting your thoughts get to you. You shouldn't be fighting right now. Not until you're able to clear your head… straighten out your thoughts and your emotions."

He started walking away, not leaving her any chance to reply.

"Are you okay, Sakura-chan?"

"I- Yeah… I'm fine."

"What happened? Why did Sasuke say you were holding back? Were you distracted or something? You did seem a little off."

Sakura moved her hand to rub at her forehead.

"Yeah, I was distracted. Don't worry about it, Naruto. It wasn't anything serious. I think I am just a little tired. I mean, this spar came out of nowhere. I wasn't really expecting to do this today."

A little nervous laughter and a small smile was all it took for Naruto to drop the subject. He helped her up with a grin and brushed a bit of the dirt off of her shoulders.

"That's okay! Now that Team Seven is back together we can spar whenever we want! Next time you'll kick that bastards ass for sure!"

"Ah, yeah…"

"Oh crap! Come on Sakura-chan, we gotta go catch up with him! We still haven't gotten to eat your homemade ramen!"

"Actually, would you mind meeting me there? I have a spare key hidden by the tree outside. I made it so you and a few others would be able to find it easily. I forgot I promised Ino that I would stop by the flower shop on my way home from shopping today."

"Hm… If you say so, but if you're not home in an hour I'm coming to get you. It's almost dinner time, and after watching you two fight it made me hungry!"

Sakura laughed, nodding. "Now go. I'll meet you there."

She took off, smile falling off her lips, and started towards the Yamanaka flower shop. Her head with drowning with Sasuke's words playing over and over and over.

* * *

"- and then he told me that I needed to clear my head and sort out my emotions. What does he even know? What? He thinks after a few hours of being around me again after being gone for almost six years he suddenly knows me? I don't understand him!"

Sakura paced the floor of the Yamanaka flower shop with her arms flailing about as she ranted. She was appreciative that Ino had kept silent while she vented but she also knew better. A silent Ino meant that she had more than enough to say in return. She knew that Ino was never really good at keeping her opinions to herself, especially when it came to a friend in need.

"I don't know, Sakura. He might be right. Remember what I said last night? You really do need to figure things out. You've spent the last two months working yourself to death and not really giving yourself time to properly sort through how you're feeling or what you want to do now that you've accomplished your goal. Not to mention you've barely even touched on the mess that is your feelings for your two lovers. You have a lot on your plate and you're just letting it sit there. Hell, if I were you, I would ask Tsunade for another week off just so you have more time to think without work piled on top of that."

"I'm not asking for more time. I didn't even want the time I've been given."

"Again, that's your problem. You're running from your issues."

"I'm not running… I'm just pushing them to the side until I have more time for them."

Sakura pretended she didn't see Ino roll her eyes.

"Look, I'm going to be honest with you-"

"When have you ever not been, Ino-pig?"

"Shut up!" She huffed, blowing a bit of hair out of her eyes. "As I was saying; I'm going to be honest with you. You're awful at caring about yourself. You spend a lot of time making sure everyone around you is happy and okay, but on the other hand you don't spend nearly as much time on yourself. And I get it, you love the people around you and sometimes running from all the yelling and mixed emotions spinning around in your head is a lot easier than facing them, but there comes a time when you just have to stop. This is that time."

"Where would I even start?"

"How about with what happened today? Why do you think Sasuke would say you were distracted?"

"I don't know? All I could think about was landing a hit on him! He moves so fast I couldn't even keep up with him. I don't know why he thought it would be a good idea to fight me, other than to see me fall on my ass a bunch of times. I mean, what did he think would happen? That I would actually win against him? That's ridiculous!"

"Why?"

Sakura frowned, "What do you mean 'why'?"

"Why is it ridiculous for you to win against him?"

"Are you kidding? He's Uchiha Sasuke. He was at the top of our class in just about everything when we were in the academy. He's always been so much more advanced than anyone I've ever known, other than maybe Naruto. He was trained by Orochimaru for four years and learned to overcome his curse mark. He not only managed to awaken the Mangekyo Sharingan, but he mastered Susanoo by the time he was barely seventeen- Ino, he has been out of my reach for as long as I can remember and he only keeps getting farther and farther away."

Everytime she looked at him it was like she was twelve years old was like she was back on the Great Naruto Bridge while Zabuza and Haku were fighting them, and she was stuck unable to do anything. It was like she was back in the Forest of Death sitting there watching Naruto and Sasuke fight while she just stood there doing nothing. It was like she was back at that bench just inside the village gates begging Sasuke not to leave her, or to take her with him, only to wake up alone on that very bench.

"How can you, or anyone, think I would be able to beat him? Even in a simple sparring match."

"Sakura, I think you're forgetting a few things. I told you last night, and I will tell you again and again until you get it into that big brain of yours: you've already caught up to him."

"You say that, but whenever I let my guard down, I don't feel that way."

"And you're going to keep feeling that way until you figure everything out. Sakura, you need to stop putting Sasuke up on a pedestal. Sure he's amazing and he has accomplished a lot of amazing things, but so have you! You were also at the top of our class, you were on equal levels of intelligence as Shikamaru. He might've trained under Orochimaru, but you also trained under Lady Tsunade and not only mastered her monster strength, but you became one of the best medical ninja known. You were able to take out a poison and make its antidote when Lady Chiyo wasn't. You took down an Akatsuki member when you were sixteen, one who even managed to best Gaara who was a Kazekage at the time. Your amazing chakra control made it possible for you to successfully form the Yin Seal, something not even Shizune-san was able to do after years of trying. For every one of Sasuke's accomplishments you have one to match. Don't play off all your years of hard work as if they are nothing."

"It just doesn't feel the same."

"We really need to work on your self confidence. I haven't seen you this unsure of yourself since you were a little bud hiding from Ami and her goons. I thought we dropped that self loathing back during our fight in the Chunin exams, or did I cut off all of my beautiful hair for nothing?"

Ino moved from behind the counter with her hand on her hip. The store was empty, and at this point she was tempted just to switch the sign to close that way she could take all the time she needed to console her best friend uninterrupted.

"Sakura, you're wilting."

She motioned towards one of the smaller flowers sitting just out of reach of the sun coming in from the window. Sakura stepped closer, eyeing the plant with sad eyes. It was bent over, petals dull in color as opposed to the other vibrant flowers around it.

"But, all you need is a little water and some sunlight." Ino took the nearby watering can and poured some water over the dry soil then gently slid the pot into direct sunlight. "Like so."

"Well, what are the human equivalent to water and sun?"

"Hm… I think that's something you're going to have to figure out. I'd say it's different for everyone. For me, it's having a good support system and learning when it's okay to give up and try again later."

"How did you figure it out?"

"I spent a lot of time thinking, both by myself and also when I was around Shika and Choji. They were pretty understanding, probably because they were going through a similar situation, but they really helped. Even if they barely said anything."

"What- What if I'm not ready to talk about these things with Naruto or Sasuke?"

"Then don't. I'm not saying avoid them, even though that's what you were doing, but maybe when you're with them focus on the moment and not your thoughts. And when you're alone, then you can think. Another thing that helped me, and I know it's kinda silly, but I wrote things down. Being able to take the thoughts out of my head and to see them physically helped clear things up. I could even go back and reflect."

"Like a journal?"

Ino hummed in agreement.

"I did read somewhere that a lot of Shinobi keep journals to reflect on missions and events that might've caused them to be emotionally distraught. Even Tsunade-shishou sometimes recommends it to the new Shinobi after their first big missions. I guess I could try that as well."

"Good. If you want, every so often I wouldn't mind talking like this either. You can stop by whenever you have free time and help me with orders and we can just talk. I've kinda missed you."

Sakura looked at her best friend. She couldn't stop the smile on her lips nor the warmth filling her chest. It really had been too long since she had been able to spend this much time with Ino.

"I'll stop by more often. I'll work on not working so much too. Just seeing you two days in a row made me realize how much I don't see my friends. I mean, I can't even remember the last time I had a normal conversation with anyone in our friends before yesterday. I guess that isn't really healthy."

"No, it's not." Ino smiled nonetheless, "And speaking of our friend group: there is a couple of handsome Shinobi standing outside my shop looking like they want something that isn't flowers. I wouldn't keep them waiting."

Blinking once, then twice in slight confusion, Sakura turned on her heels only to be met with the sight of Naruto and Sasuke standing just outside the shop's doors. She would've stepped forward if it wasn't for Ino's voice calling out.

"Naruto! Sasuke! Welcome! To what do I owe the visit? Do you need flowers? Or maybe something that isn't in our catalogue?"

Blood rushed to Sakura's cheeks painting her face a shade of pink that almost rivaled her hair.

"Ah, hi Ino! We're just here to pick up Sakura-chan. The bastard and I got bored waiting at your apartment so we thought we would come get you early."

"Ooh, they were at your apartment, Sakura? Alone? I didn't know they had a key."

"Ino-pig…" Her name passed Sakura's lips through clenched teeth hidden behind a forced smile. "You know fully well that I have a spare for my friends to get in if they ever need to. I told Naruto about it so that way they could get inside."

"Hm, did I know that? Must've slipped my mind. Well anyways," Ino grinned playfully, "You boys can take Sakura here home, she and I had more than enough girl talk and I bet she is tired. She must've had quite the workout given all the dirt she tracked in here."

There was just no controlling her best friend and her mouth. Sakura shook her head, deciding that she would get Ino back later. For now, she just wanted to go home and eat.

"It was nice talking with you, Ino-pig!"

She moved quickly towards the door, not wanting to give the blonde any more fuel to tease her. Not when she didn't even know how she felt about what she was being teased for. Ino was right; she did have too much on her plate that was untouched.

She smiled at her teammates, "Okay, who's hungry?"

* * *

The walk home was uneventful, filled with mindless chatter and Naruto's voice making sure there wasn't anything remotely close to silence between the three of them. It was almost comforting.

"So, we knew you were pretty tired Sakura-chan." Naruto spoke as she was opening the door. "And we knew that you said that you were going to cook for us, but we thought since you are on vacation that you shouldn't have to do that…"

Walking into her apartment, Sakura took in the scent of food. It was enough to make her mouth water and her stomach growl at an embarrassingly loud volume.

"So Sasuke and I made the ramen for you! When I taste tested it, I have to say that it tasted really good. Like, it's no Ichiraku ramen, but it's good!"

She was almost at a loss for words, watching the grin on Naruto's face grow and seeing the smallest of smiles from Sasuke was enough to make her forget some of the worries she had. She pulled them both into a hug, throwing all of her cares to the wind as she held them.

"Thank you."

After a moment, she let them go and once more her face was lightly flushed.

"Well, you actually should be thanking Sasuke. He did most of the cooking since I only really know how to make cup ramen, but I helped a bit too! So it wasn't all him. I bet if I had a recipe I would've been able to make it all by myself."

"Shut up, idiot. None of that matters."

"Don't call me an idiot, you bastard! And it does matter! Next time I'll cook a whole meal for Sakura-chan and you won't have to help at all."

"I don't think Sakura would appreciate you burning down her apartment."

"What did you say?"

She listened as the two of them bickered back and forth, and before she knew it she was laughing.

"You two are ridiculous. Do you ever think you'll stop arguing with each other?"

She shook her head as they were back at it, this time about how they didn't argue and who started most of their arguments.

" _Kami, I love them…"_

She let the thought linger in her head, and after a moment she smiled to herself.

"Alright boys, break it up before I go and eat all of the ramen."

"No! Sakura-chan I want some too!"

Maybe taking some time off wasn't going to be too bad.

* * *

It had been few hours since Sasuke and Naruto had left with promises of talking to her tomorrow and Sakura found herself sitting in bed after a rather long bath. She had her legs propped up with a blank notebook rested up against them and a pen in her hand.

"How do I even start one of these? Do I write it like a mission report?" Pause. "Actually, that isn't a bad idea."

She hummed in consideration, taking the pen to the paper and writing.

 _These last few months have been hectic. I've spent countless hours at the hospital, doing what I thought was needed to help progress along, but what might actually have been me running from issues I wasn't wanting to admit I had. It wasn't until after I had been ordered to take a leave of absence that I was able to come to terms with these issues. I am on my first official day off from work and I can say that I am off to a rough start. I lost control of my emotions during a conversation with Uzumaki Naruto and Uchiha Sasuke which ended with me crying for quite some time. I will admit at after I was done, it felt like a small bit of weight had been moved off my chest, something I've been feeling for quite some time._ There is a sentence crossed out with the words "I lost" crossed out twice. _I sparred with Sasuke as well today. I was able to land a single hit on him, which I find to be a success for the short amount of time that was our fight. We stopped due to my hesitation._ Another sentence is crossed out, but the words are unreadable after she had nearly torn a hole through the page with the pen. _I believe I was hesitant due to a lack of confidence in myself. Sasuke seemed to notice that. I wonder if he has always been able to see these things with me._

 _After the spar was over I went to visit Yamanaka Ino at her family's flower shop. I was able to vent to her, and in return she set me straight. Ino was able to, once again, open my eyes to what I had been missing. She says that I have issues noticing my own strengths and that I have a habit of seeing my teammate's accomplishments as greater than my own._

 _We also spoke about other feelings I am having. Those pertaining to_ The word "love" is written and crossed out twice. _my romantic feelings towards Sasuke and Naruto. I've always known that I've loved Sasuke. When I was younger it wasn't the same kind of love I feel now, but nonetheless I believe I've always loved him. Before he had returned to the village, I found myself believing that I would never have the chance to actually express my love for him, I believed that he would never come back despite all of mine and Naruto's efforts to bring him back. I think that now that he is back, now that I can see him every day, I am afraid that he will reject me._

 _I don't remember when I started to love Naruto. All I know is one day, before the war, I was looking at him and I thought to myself that I loved him. I_ The word "wanted" is crossed out. _want to support all of his dreams and ambitions. I want to make sure they come true. I want him to always be happy. I want him to be happy with me at his side. At first I tried to convince myself that I loved him as if he were a brother, but the feeling felt wrong. I've been certain for some time now that I love him. I am afraid that I am too late._

 _I'm not sure if this counts as sorting out my emotions._

 _I've also decided to try and figure out a new goal. The last few years I've worked towards becoming stronger and bringing Sasuke back home. I can always find areas to get stronger in, and we've brought Sasuke home. I think it's time to think of something new to work towards._

Sakura took in a breath, closing her eyes. After a moment, and another deep breath, she re-read everything that she wrote. After she was done, she turned to a blank page and began writing once more.

 _Things to Strive Towards:_

 _Learn to believe in my own accomplishments_

 _Make a difference in my village_

"I can add more as I think of them."

Her eyes traced over the goals once more. Content with her writing, she placed the pen inside the book before closing it and placing it on the nightstand beside her bed. She closed her eyes, took in a deep breath and counted to ten before letting out all the air. She repeated the process slowly.

" _One… two… three…"_


End file.
